Grocery list: June 23, 2013

photoThree has thrown us for a loop.

We thought that we had a sneak preview of three over the last six months. Naw. It turns out that The Kid delayed two until about January or February so that she could slipstream directly into three.

Defiance, testing boundaries, manipulation, deception…all hallmarks of the Paventi family, but now that I see it in my three-year-old daughter, I’m beginning to worry that she comes from a long line of sociopaths. And, by logical deduction, that makes me a sociopath. The only thing in our favor right now is that she cannot drive, tell time or operate door knobs.

Seriously though, today was the first Sunday in a while that she did not accompany me for a Sunday grocery trip. She is not the “gimmie gimmie gimmie” kid at the store. She gets bored sitting in the cart and wants out as quickly as possible. Sometimes this happens in the checkout line. Sometimes it happens before we cross the threshold of the store.

And, like any typical three-year-old/sociopath, when she doesn’t get her way, the results are not pretty. I mean, no one has died (yet), but it can get loud. Last week, I forgot to grab cream cheese. I left The Wife and The Kid a few aisles ahead of the dairy area and walked back. As I was picking up my tub of whipped light cream cheese, I could hear The Kid announce that she wanted to go home.

The Kid. My kid.

So, I went it alone today. It was quick. It was quiet. But, it was lonely.

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